Bacon is good for you

This was another post I made. It was never replied to, which made me sad. Here's what it had to say:

I told you so.

In case the link stops working, this is what was included in the article:

Perfect when paired with a fine aged can of Coke.

I suffered through an entire paragraph about lettuce just to unearth this miraculous news for you: bacon is healthy. And so is sausage. And hot dogs. No word yet on spam, but authorities agree that cured, processed meat rocks our collective (soggy) nutritional socks!

Oh how I love science by press release. As if I needed a reason to justify my pack-a-day bacon habit (is she kidding, is she serious, the world may never know), a new study finds that the nitrates found in cured, processed meat food are not only good for you, but exert a protective effect on damaged heart tissues following a heart attack. Technically, it’s actually nitrites that offer this cardiovascular benefit, but nitrites and nitrates are kissing cousins, chemically speaking. And technically, greens offer far more nitrite and nitrate than does bacon. But the obvious point here is that bacon has the goods. The researchers say that this discovery is ironic, and I’ve really loved that word ever since Winona Ryder couldn’t define it in Reality Bites.

This whole time, we (and I’m speaking for the medical community here) thought nitrites - well, nitrates - were toxic. Ultimately, they may prove to be carcinogenic, but at least they are good for your heart. Cancer, cardiovascular concerns: you have to make a choice. I suggest emailing this to your doctor. Although, this is likely to be redundant because I’m fairly certain he already subscribes to Healthbolt for all his health and wellness information.

Want to get more lettuce in your diet? Your steadfast devotion to avoiding green things is admirable, but it’s time to show the rabbits who’s in charge. Here are six tasty ways to eat greens. Ridiculously cute bunny included at no extra charge.